Reality . . .

So the time has finally come.  We are packing our bags and getting set to end the Journey to JP and begin the Journey with JP.

And, we must not be mistaken that it will be a journey.

If you could imagine an x-ray that looked inside the emotions of our family, you would see relief and excitement and joy.  The best word I can think of to describe how we feel: anticipation. We are ready to introduce him to his new home and his cozy new bed.  We are ready to watch him bake in our kitchen and learn funny English words that make him giggle and join our family dance parties.  We are ready to watch him grow and learn and flourish in our home.  We are ready to be forever changed by his presence, and then one day, to not even remember a time when he was not here.

But, if there were an x-ray that looked inside the emotions of JP, I think the best word to describe how he feels would be apprehension.  Sure, he might think we are kind and smiley and interesting.  But, those observations are not enough when he needs to trust us as his parents. In a week from Saturday, we feel that we will be giving him the hope of a family; but, to him, we will be taking him from all he has known.

And, while I would like to think he will not feel fear, I am certain he will feel apprehension.  Will they be kind to me? Will I get hurt in this bathtub, this car, this plane? Why are they so different than me and everyone I have ever seen? Will I ever understand what they are saying? There will be some comforts of home that we will never be able to replicate.  And, there will be a piece of his heritage, perhaps even himself, lost that day.

Of course, we plan to spend months, if not years, refilling that which was lost with beautiful memories and unconditional love, so that the Bell Family and America become his home. But, adoption always comes after trauma, and Philip and I can't be naive in thinking that he will see this transition as amazing as we do.  Not now, anyway.

So, this is our new reality.  Teaching a little one--who has had few trustworthy people in his life--the important lesson that we can be trusted. That we aren't going anywhere.  If he is scared, we will be there.  If he tests us or rebels against us, we will forgive him.  If we struggle emotionally or financially, we do so as a family.

If you have felt led to pray for our family, please pray specifically for JP's heart.  That the Lord would give him peace in this transition and that the Lord would give us wisdom to minister to him in ways we cannot even imagine.  Without the ability to communicate orally, much of what we say in our earliest times together will be in our actions, our facial expressions, and the unspoken emotions we convey.  We ask Him to guard those communications to foster trust and love, not apprehension.

Thank you all for walking alongside us, for encouraging us as we wait, and for going to the Father on our behalf.  We are grateful, and we know the Lord will sustain.