Lessons . . .

Her name was Loretta Hermann. She was a slight woman, with short, black hair and a high-pitched voice.  We were a group of fourth graders, forced to spend every Wednesday night in Confirmation classes.  While she tried to instill in us the Ten Commandments and the Apostles' Creed, we could be found climbing above and below the tables, giggling with our friends.  If another church member had come in during these meetings--especially one of the elders--I am certain that we would have been sitting in our seats, the recipients of one strong, communal scolding, wearing those long faces that come early and stay long after, when we got home and our parents got ahold of us.  But that didn't happen.  And so, sweet Ms. Hermann did what many teachers often do amidst chaos: she begged us to Listen, Please!; she tried to make things as entertaining as possible through what I am sure was pretty comedic singing and dancing; and then, sometimes, she simply gave up, probably going home at night to wonder if any of her time spent with our group of hooligans was worth it.

Fourth grade Confirmation classes were all about memorization.  It wasn't until the sixth or seventh grade, right before we were confirmed, that we started thinking and questioning and discerning.  But, as nine- and ten-year olds, it was our job to have some knowledge of the Bible and the Christian faith etched into our minds.  We memorized a ton that year, and I can say that I still use the New Testament song I learned to find obscure books, so that I don't look like an idiot flipping back and forth through the pages.  It has made me look smarter than the next guy often.

Most of the curriculum that year was probably quite scripted.  There were things we were expected to know.  But, I remember one thing we learned because it was near and dear to Ms. Hermann's heart:  the 23rd Psalm. I remember sitting in front of her and reciting it, verse by verse, week after week. Like most people who grew up in church, I am certain that John 3:16 was the first piece of Scripture that I ever learned.  But, the 23rd Psalm had to have been the second.

Honestly, I had kind of forgotten about Ms. Hermann and that Confirmation class.  In my mid-twenties,  I had reached the height of my career dreams, and I did not "want" for anything,  Yet, I was miserable. I had become a mother, and suddenly, the aspirations I once had no longer held their value.  And while I worked at a wonderful place, with very kind people, I could not let go of the internal conflict inside me:  how do I let go of the time and effort I have spent reaching these goals, and at the same time, how do I commit so much to my work when I just want to be home? I remember driving to work many mornings with tears streaming down my face.  And, one of those mornings, the Word in my heart--placed there by the work of Loretta Hermann in my fourth grade Confirmation class--rose up inside me. I started to recite the 23rd Psalm: "Lord, you are my Shepherd; I shall not want." After that day, I recited the 23rd Psalm continuously on my way to work.  And through that Scripture, I found the peace and strength to continue until we had our second child, and I could stay home.

Now, ten years later, that same chapter has given me indescribable comfort.  While I am out of control, I can pray that chapter over J.P. and know that God is in control.  When I am anxious, I can speak aloud and gain peace.  When I am powerless, I can be reminded that God is powerful yesterday, today, and forever.   If these promises are true, what have we to fear?

Lord, you are J.P.'s shepherd,
He shall not want.
You make him to lie down in green pastures
You lead him beside still waters
You restore his soul
You lead him in path of righteousness for Your name's sake

Yea, though he walk through the valley of the shadow of darkness
He will not fear evil, for You are with him
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort him
You prepare a table before him in the presence of his enemies
You anoint his head with oil, his cup overflows

Surely, goodness and mercy will follow him all the days of his life
And he will dwell in the house of the Lord forever


As I prepare to head back to school,  I am encouraged by the example of Loretta Hermann.  I am sure she thought she was speaking into air, but she wasn't.  She was speaking Truth into my young heart, and that Truth has sustained me time and again.  When she forced me to memorize that chapter 25 years ago, I probably didn't want to.  I probably thought she was a bit "kooky". In fact, I may have even called her "kooky" under my breath, while giggling to my friends under the table.   But, because she never gave up, because she approached her mission with such passion, most of us obliged her "kooky" requests.  And, that dedication is now fruit in the next generation.

As an educator in the public schools, I won't be teaching my students Scripture. But I can still love them fervently, even when I want to squeeze their little heads or go home and cry (I promise I have only ever gone home and cried, except for the one time I actually cried at school).  I can find those truths about life and character-building and hard work and respect that are meaningful and hold fast to them even if I look a bit "kooky".  And, I can try to remember that those little, awkward people who don't want to listen to me will one day be smart, refined citizens of the world who need a strong character and a little truth to fall back on when life gets tough.

I do not know if she has gone to be with the Lord yet; I would guess that she was close to sixty when she taught our class.  But, she will one day come into His presence, and while I am no Judge, I think He will have found her faithful.  And, I too look forward to seeing her there one day, two "kooky" teachers together, who get to share in the privilege and delight of dwelling in the house of the Lord forever.